Sunday, November 13, 2011

Perpetual Countdown

I haven't posted in quite a while, but I have had some things on my mind and this seemed like a good outlet.

I was posting on twitter today counting down the days until I am able to see my boyfriend again, and I realized that I spend a lot of my time and effort counting things down. I've had this recurring feeling lately that I am always waiting for the next thing; I'm living for the next weekend, the next time I get to see my boyfriend, family, or friends. It is difficult to just live in the moment without constantly thinking of my next countdown "goal". As much as I try to ignore these feelings, I cannot seem to simply be 100% content with my current situation. I don't want to live just weekend to weekend, waiting for when I get to see the important people in my life. How does one relax and enjoy the status quo?

My mom once told me about a friend of hers that had moved around quite a bit in her life. She asked her how she did it - how she was able to adapt to moving around after just a year or two living in one place. The answer was that she just made friends and invested effort in those friendships, even though she knew she would not be there for a long duration. I have tried to remind myself of her outlook on life when I get in a rut where I'm at. I need to be able to be happy with the way things are before I can move on to the future. This isn't easy in any way, but I am working on concentrating on the here and now. If I don't, I will miss out on this entire period of my life without even realizing it, and I know I will regret it later in life.

So, even though today I am counting down 10 days until Thanksgiving break....I will try to concern myself more with focusing on doing well at work this week, spending time with my local friends, and keeping up with my training regimen. These are the day-to-day things that I could miss out on if I don't take the time to stop and think.

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